Since I’ve lived in Denmark for some time, it can be hard to get in the headspace of a newcomer.
But that was my assignment recently when I spoke to a couple of hundred new students at the University of Copenhagen, who had just arrived in Denmark the day before.
I thought that some of these tips might be useful to you, my podcast listeners.
So here we go, lightning round, word association style.
Get an ugly bicycle in Copenhagen
Bicycle. When you arrive in Copenhagen, get one quickly, and get an ugly one. Don’t get a fancy one that is exciting to thieves. Denmark has a bicycle culture, but it also has a big bicycle theft culture.
A good option is a second-hand bike, but get it someplace legit, because if you get it from some random online you might find yourself riding someone else’s stolen bike.
Biking gives you freedom, it can take you anywhere at any time in any season in Denmark. And if you don’t know how to ride a bike, the Danish Red Cross has free classes for adults.
Yes, you do have to pay for public transport in Denmark
Transport tickets. There are no fare gates on the Danish metro or bus or train. You’re just trusted to buy a ticket.
However, there are controllers that go around and check, and if you don’t have precisely the right ticket when they check you, you will get a big fine.
Don’t bother with a dramatic story about how you didn’t understand the ticket system because you’re an innocent child from a faraway land.
Don’t cry. It doesn’t work, I’ve tried.
Keep your dignity, pay the fine, and then if you think it’s unfair, email the transport company. You can often get the fine reduced, in particular if it’s your first fine.
First names only in Danish culture
First names only. In Denmark, everybody goes by their first name. That includes university professors, bosses, priests, schoolteachers, doctors, even the prime minister. Mette. Mette Frederiksen.
Nobody uses Mr or Mrs or Doctor titles.
This is also true for older people. You don’t have to address them as Ma’am or Sir or Aunty or any of the other forms of respect common in other cultures. Just their first names – it’s what they want.
Always be on time in Denmark
Time and trust: Being on time is a big part of building trust in Denmark. A 10am class really is a 10am class, a 2pm meeting really is a 2pm meeting, and even for social events you have to be on time.
If someone invites you for dinner at 7 you really have to be there at 7.00.00. Otherwise your food will be cold. None of this turning up fashionably late.
And if you say that you’re going to be someplace, you really do have to turn up, or the Danes will be heartbroken. They were counting on you.
Splitting the check on a date in Denmark
Dating. Dating in Denmark is very egalitarian. The check is usually split in half. If it’s a male female date, the man may offer to pay, the woman might say no, and that doesn’t mean the date is a flop. People just like to be equal.
In general, Danes can be prickly about someone else picking up the check in a restaurant, even with friends – they do not want to feel obligated. Usually everyone splits the bill.
The exception is your birthday, when you pay for everything.
How to party if you don’t drink alcohol in Denmark
Drinking. Not all of Danish social life still centers on alcohol, but a lot still does. If you don’t drink alcohol , I’d recommend going to parties and Friday bars anyway and having elderflower juice, hyldeblomst. It’s a local favorite, light and sweet with zero alcohol.
You can also have what they call danskvand, or Danish water, that’s just plain water with bubbles in it. Put in a lemon or lime, it looks like a cocktail, nobody’s going to ask you any questions.
If you do drink alcohol, beer is generally pretty cheap in Denmark, wine less so, and cocktails very expensive. It’s common for a group of friends to drink at home before they go out to save money. (The Danes call it warm, in other words, warming up to a night on the town.)
Saving money in Copenhagen
Saving money. Restaurants and cafés and takeout are all very expensive here, so you’ve got to learn to cook for yourself or you’ll go broke. Look for items in supermarkets with yellow labels. Yellow is the color of discounts in Denmark.
Supermarkets often cut the price on food the day before it goes out of date. If you eat meat, you can buy a lot of this discount about-to-expire meat, freeze it, and eat it whenever you like. (I also recommend the app To Good To Go which offers discounts on “surprise bags” of bakery products, sushi, and other about-to-expire food as an initiative to avoid food waste.)
One thing you cannot do here is negotiate a discount at the supermarket checkout, and yes, I have seen people try. Flea markets, yes, supermarkets no.
You’ll notice that many of the staff in supermarkets are under 18. That’s because employers are legally allowed to pay young people less.
Your doctor in Denmark
Your doctor. Every person in Denmark legally gets to choose a primary care doctor, this is the famous tax-funded universal care. The doctors are self-employed, they own their clinics, but they are paid by the government, you don’t pay to see them.
What you do have pay for is medicine. If you need a prescription, they’ll send it electronically to a central system and you can pick it up at any pharmacy in Denmark, the price is the same everywhere.
That said, Danish doctors are often reluctant to prescribe medicine, in particular sleeping medication and antibiotics. These are t ough to get.
When you need someone to talk to in Denmark
Mental health. It’s August, it’s the light times, now is the time to start finding friend groups and activities, because the dark times are on their way. You do not want to be sitting all alone in your room during the dark times – November, December, January, February.
If you’re in Denmark and feeling alone and desperate, and the wait to talk to your doctor or to a free public counselor is too long, you can always make an appointment with a Danish priest.
Now, don’t freak out. You don’t even have to be a Christian! In the Danish state church, the priests are often middle-aged women. They’re not going to wear a funny outfit or talk too much about Jesus. They’ll just listen to you.
If you really need someone to talk to, a Danish priest from the state church is available in every neighborhood in Denmark. It’s fast, and it’s free. Don’t wait.
(Find your local branch of the state church in Denmark here.)
Hanging out with the Danish Royal Family
The Danish Royal Family. They are not big celebrities like the British Royal Family, you will see them walking around, especially in Copenhagen. I remember when I first got here looking through the window of a hair salon and seeing the then-Queen getting her hair washed.
If you’re a young person like the people in my university audience, you might see Crown Prince Christian, the future king, out having a few beers. He’s 20, whatever, he likes beer. Same for his sister, who is 19 and currently in the Danish Army. When she gets a break she probably likes some beers as well.
If you’re single and heterosexual, keep in mind that Danish Royals always marry foreigners, never other Danes. The current King married a woman from Australia, his Mom married a Frenchman, his grandpa a Swede, his great-grandpa a German. So you have a chance.
Quiet, taxis, gifts in Denmark
Quiet. Denmark is a quiet country. You might be on a bus or a train FaceTiming with a friend at home and see a Dane looking at you in a disapproving way.
You might think it’s because you are a foreigner, and that could be true, but it could also be because you’re loud.
With the exception of those drunken Friday bars, this is a quiet country.
Listen to the traffic: there are almost no horns honking. Most Danish trains have a “silent car” where no one is allowed to talk or play music.
Danes like peacefulness. If you are loud, voice loud, music loud, TikTok on your phone with no earphones loud, any type of loud, you are going to get funny looks.
Taxis. Taxis aren’t as common here as they are in many other big cities, because public transport is reliable and clean and used by every social class. And taxis are expensive.
You can’t really call a taxi by raising your arm like you do in Hong Kong or New York City.
You have to go to a taxi stand or call a taxi to where you are, or use the local taxi app. And the local version of Uber is just another version of the local taxi app.
If you absolutely must use a taxi, perhaps if you have a lot of luggage, use the fixed price option in the app. This will help you avoid getting an unscheduled tour of the city.
Gifts. In many countries, gifts are a social cue and and important part of doing business, but not in Denmark.
You should never give your professor or your boss flowers or candy or any other kind of gift. They’ll be very uncomfortable if you do. They see it as a form of corruption, which is not OK in Denmark.
You also should not offer money to university administrators to get what you want, such as a better housing assignment, or to municipal officials or immigration staff to get them to bend the rules.
They will be angry if you do. This is not the Danish way.